Six months transpired swiftly. Rainy season came and went; summer’s humidity spared none. Fall is here. I am cold and I am happy.
It’s difficult to perceive of personal change on some sort of measurable scale. I’m not so deluded as to believe that I can wade through bias and selfish impulses in order to arrive at an objective conclusion. Yet I feel change. In its most palpable form, it is taking me somewhere new. I don’t know where I was before, and I don’t know where I’m heading, but I feel movement. One week into my stay in Tokyo, I wrote, “A quick note to my future self, whoever you are: Please look back on your life and time in Japan as transformative and essential to your current existence.” Halfway through my contract, I simultaneously feel accomplished yet incomplete, proud yet terrified, anxious yet excited. I’m happy— genuinely— and I want so much more.
I’m grateful for the opportunity everyday to revel in my insignificance. The world is large. Humanity is vast. There’s so much left to experience. I continue to amble on in pursuit of my own contentment.
Heaven, the staggeringly gorgeous new album from The Bilinda Butchers, soundtracked the better part of my summer. Check it out here via Orchid Tapes.